On Friday, Becky shared that she and her husband are celebrating their 30th anniversary this summer. (Happy anniversary!) That post happened to land on the day of Ken and my 49th wedding anniversary. I enjoyed reading Becky’s marriage journey so much that I thought I’d share ours too.
Ken and I met when his brother and my best friend from high school were dating, and they set us up on a blind date. I don’t really believe in love at first sight, but it was definitely intense like at first sight. Ken had finished two years of junior college and was headed to Kansas State University. I was about to start my freshman year at Emporia State College (then called Kansas State Teachers College).
We had a long-distance courtship that school year, writing daily letters to each other between our campuses that were eighty miles apart. We got married on August 11 the following summer.
After our wedding, we lived in campus married housing at K-State one semester but after the Christmas break, on Ken’s 21st birthday, we dropped out of school, loaded all our earthly belongings into a 24-foot rental truck, drove our Ford Pinto into the truck, and headed for New York City where Ken had always dreamed of working in the publishing industry as an illustrator.
That move is probably one of the best things we ever did for our marriage. We had each other and the Lord to depend upon. No running home to mama when things got tough (and they did get tough!) but we grew closer to each other and to God during the next two years than probably at any other time in our marriage. We lived on love and oatmeal. (You can read a bit more of that story here.)
Even as a young teenager, I had been told by several doctors that I probably would not be able to conceive children. But two years after moving to New York, God surprised us with a miracle pregnancy. We knew we wanted to raise our son near our parents, so in the summer of 1976, with me eight months-plus pregnant, we loaded everything into another rental truck and with the help of dear friends from our church in New York, we moved back to Kansas.
Our son, Tarl, was born in October and doctors said he was a miracle and we shouldn’t expect to have any more. But three years later, the Lord blessed us with our daughter, Tobi, and we rejoiced to have one of each. Two years minus one week later God gave us another son, Trey, and we were ecstatic. Then eight years later, to all our great surprise, Tavia made her entrance into the world. I gave birth to a baby in the ’70s, two in the ’80s, and one in 1990, meaning we had kids in our home for thirty-two years! You can believe we are enjoying our empty nest! Haha! But these four are the greatest blessings of our life!
Life was crazy and chaotic, including two years where we had four kids in four different schools! But before we knew what hit us, the kids grew up and started leaving home.
We’d been blessed to rent a four-bedroom duplex very cheap, which allowed me to stay home with the kids all through their school years. I started writing to pay for college, and once the oldest three had their degrees, we bought our first house. Soon our kids were bringing home special gals and guys, and then Tobi got married and made us Papa and Mimi, our most cherished titles!
The weddings and grandbabies came in quick succession after that and now all four of the kids are married-with-kids. And just look at us! We grew by four last year and barely fit in one house now.
Oh, but these are our hearts! ❤️ How we love them! We can’t wait to see what God will do in each of these precious ones’ lives. We feel so very blessed. Thanks for letting me share our story. Ken’s grandparents each lived to be 101 and they celebrated their eighty-second anniversary! I don’t expect that Ken and I will do the same, but we do hope we have many more years together to enjoy the life God has given us and to serve Him with all our hearts.
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Susan Sams Baggott says
What a beautiful story of love and commitment. Thank you for sharing. Happy 49th anniversary.
Deborah Raney says
Thank you!
Susan Baggott says
What a beautiful story of love and commitment. Thank you for sharing. Happy 49th Anniversary. After a surgery when I was 20, I too was told I would likely never have children. When I conceived my forth child I was told I’d never carry her to term and if I did she would be severely disabled. She was born at Ft Riley Kansas and is a beautiful, healthy 33 year old who became engaged this summer.
Deborah Raney says
Oh, Susan, what a wonderful story of God’s goodness and faith! Our youngest will turn 33 this year too! So happy to hear this!
Katherine Keeler says
Beautiful life/ love story. Thanks for sharing. Happy anniversary!
Deborah Raney says
Thanks so much. We’re having fun working on #50! 🙂
Melanie Phillips says
Dear Deb and KW, So many years of friendship and love!! We were happy to help you move from NY back to Kansas but sad to have our closest friends move so far away. Wayne and I were talking about some fun memories… your first time seeing the beautiful fall leaves here in New York because Kansas doesn’t have the maple trees that we have here, the first snowfall and then getting to have snowball fights and sledding, going Christmas Caroling, rides to Bear Mountain, flag football, baseball, swimming at my parents pool, all the church activities and being newlyweds together! We never did get to take you to the Jersey shore though!So glad we’ve remained friends all these years and even happier that we’ve added getting together every few years lately. I must say it brought a tear to my eye when you wrote about visiting the Red Rocker place in NC this spring. I think that was the last place we visited during the first time we had gotten together in over 20 years!! What fun that was to “catch up” in person… I don’t think Wayne and KW had a minutes peace from our yakking 😂.
Love you guys and wish you many, many more years of blessings together~ Mel
Deborah Raney says
Well, now you’ve made me cry, Mel! We are SO very grateful for our friendship and especially thankful that we’ve been able to get together several times over the last few years. God was so very good to us to lead us to Tallman Bible Church and put you two in our lives. I love how the years just fall away when we get together. We need to be planning one of those trips again soon! Love you much!
Tamera Alexander says
Praising God for yours and Ken’s journey together and for His loving hand in it all. And all the pics… Fabulous! 😉
Deborah Raney says
It was fun to write and remember. So thankful Becky led the way with her story!
Janetta Messmer says
Happy Anniversary to you and Ken. I loved both of your stories (I clicked on the other one too). My belief is that every child should move away from their parents to find their footing. They’ll learn to trust God, as you two did. And, Deb, it’s funny, while reading your stories, I’m was eating oatmeal. 🤣🥰🤣 Love you!
Deborah Raney says
Haha! I love that you were eating oatmeal! And I agree with you that it’s great for kids to start out marriage “leaving their father and mother.” Once the kids come along, then grandparents are a huge blessing!
Roxanne Henke says
Ohhh, I love your love story. ❤️ And the oatmeal story. (I would have been in big trouble as cooked oatmeal is one of the very few foods I simply can’t eat.)
Deborah Raney says
Well, I can tell you we had a hard time looking a bowl of oatmeal in the eye for a few years after that, but we really enjoy it again now.
Pam Meyers says
I’ve seen some of these pics before, but I never realized how curly Ken’s hair was back in the day. Beautiful family for someone who was told she’d never have kids and then when one came you were told not to expect to have another.
Deborah Raney says
Oh, he had TONS of curls back in the day. And yes, I stand in awe that God gave us 4 when doctors told me it was impossible. And not just one doctor but 5 or 6!
Angie says
What a great story of love and God’s blessing! I so enjoyed reading it–and seeing all the photos. I hope you make it to that 82nd anniversary, and wouldn’t be at all surprised if you do. 🙂
Deborah Raney says
We are willing to carry on the tradition! 🙂
Nicole Santana says
49 years!!! That’s fantastic. Congratulations and happy anniversary!!!
Deborah Raney says
Thanks, Nicole!
Linda J Kish says
Beautiul story
Deborah Raney says
Thank you, Linda.
Rebecca Trump says
What a blessing God has bestowed on you and your husband. Happy Anniversary!! And I hope you have many, many more. Enjoy that beautiful family!!
Deborah Raney says
Thanks so much, Rebecca. We intend to enjoy them to the fullest as long as God allows!
Karen Witemeyer says
What a beautiful life story, Deb! A story of courage, commitment, and abundant love. And your mention of Ken’s parents blew my mind – 82 years of marriage? WOW!!! Amazing.
Deborah Raney says
Isn’t that amazing?! It was his grandparents, actually, his mom’s parents. I think they were 17 and 18 when they got married. We were young, but not THAT young (I was 19 and Ken turned 21 that December) so Grandma and Grandpa had a good headstart. 🙂
Caryl Kane says
Happy Anniversary! May the Lord continue to richly bless you and Ken!
Deborah Raney says
Thank you, Caryl! Thus far He has blessed us beyond richly!
Robin Lee Hatcher says
I loved reading your story. I knew it from conversations but reading it with photos made it extra lovely. Happy anniversary. I hope you make it to your 82nd too. That’s only another 34 years, right?
Deborah Raney says
I remember when we celebrated our 41st and felt we had a LOT of years under our belts, we suddenly realized we were only HALFWAY to Grandma and Grandpa’s 82 years! 🙂
Harriet Glenn says
What a blessing God has been in your lives during these 49 years! He knew, when doctors didn’t, that he had big plans for you to rear four Godly children who would in turn rear more Godly children. Not to mention how you would bless others with your Christian writing! May you and Ken spend many more years as happy parents and grandparents.
Deborah Raney says
Thank you, Harriet. Ken and I pray every morning that not ONE of our precious kids or grandkids will ever turn away from the Lord. It is our most heartfelt prayer of our lives.
Betty Strohecker says
Congratulations Deb and Ken! What a wonderful story! Thanks for sharing the beautiful pictures!
Deborah Raney says
Thanks, Betty. Some of those photos are blurry and faded, but the memories are precious as ever!
Becky Wade says
I loved reading the story of your marriage, Deb! God bless you and your beautiful family. 🙂
Deborah Raney says
Thanks for giving me the idea, Becky! I loved reading your story too! God has blessed us both in amazing ways!
Debra DuPree Williams says
Deb,
Congratulations on 49 years! It sounds like a beautiful marriage filled with so many blessings!
Hubby and I will celebrate 50 on the 18th. Those years flew by! Like you, I birthed children in the 70s, 80s, and 90s, and our youngest turns 33 at the end of this year.
We’ve experienced ups and downs, good days and bad, and with God finally at the center, we’re happier than ever before. What a difference having a personal relationship with Him makes!
Blessings to you and Ken and your beautiful family.
Debbie
Deborah Raney says
Wow! We have a lot more than just our names in common! That is so cool! I’m not sure I’ve ever met anyone else who gave birth to kids in 3 decades (though I’m sure it was common in earlier years!)
And yes, we’ve certainly had those ups and downs too. Ken always says x-number of happy years and a few doozies! Thankfully the “doozies” came a month or two here, a week or two there, with lots of happy in between. But I am eternally thankful that we stuck out the tough times and depended on God to carry us through!
Lauraine Marcus says
Happy 49th! We will be celebrating our 50th anniversary this year in December but celebrating it this the end of this month and first week in September because it would be too cold to go on an Alaskan cruise then! I pray that your 50th next year will be full of Joy!
Deborah Raney says
Thank you, Lauraine, and a very happy anniversary to you too! Have a wonderful time on your cruise! Alaska is on Ken’s bucket list!
Lynne Hess says
Happy Anniversary, Deb! Great story and adorable couple, even after all these years. Pretty cute kids and grandbabies, too!
Deborah Raney says
Thank you, Lynne! We couldn’t be more proud of those kids and grandkids! What a blessing they are!
Jennyrae Ottenhoff says
What a beautiful story about God’s amazing blessings in your lives!
Deborah Raney says
Thanks so much, Jennyrae. God is good!
Jennifer Black says
I loved reading more of how God brought you two together…and I am so thankful he did. <3 Happy anniversary to a wonderful couple!
Deborah Raney says
Awww, thanks, Jennifer. Always love when you hop on the blog to comment!
Gail Helgeson says
I love your story. You are my inspiration. I love reading your books and learning about how God has worked in you and your husband’s life. May God’s favor continue to be upon you.
Deborah Raney says
I’m just now seeing this, Gail! Thank you so much! We have a mutual admiration society going!