Does your church still print a bulletin? Even if they don’t, I hope this collection of actual bulletin bloopers will brighten your day!
The Fasting & Prayer Conference includes meals.
The sermon this morning: “Jesus Walks on the Water.” The sermon tonight: “Searching for Jesus.”
Our youth basketball team is back in action Wednesday at 8 PM in the recreation hall. Come out and watch us kill Christ the King.
Ladies, don’t forget the rummage sale. It’s a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Bring your husbands.
The peacemaking meeting scheduled for today has been canceled due to a conflict.
Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our community. Smile at someone who is hard to love. Say “Hell” to someone who doesn’t care much about you.
Don’t let worry kill you off – let the Church help.
Miss Charlene Mason sang “I will not pass this way again,” giving obvious pleasure to the congregation.
For those of you who have children and don’t know it, we have a nursery downstairs.
Next Thursday there will be tryouts for the choir. They need all the help they can get.
The Rector will preach his farewell message after which the choir will sing: “Break Forth Into Joy.”
Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on October 24 in the church. So ends a friendship that began in their school days.
A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall. Music will follow.
At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be “What Is Hell?” Come early and listen to our choir practice.
Eight new choir robes are currently needed due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.
Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles and other items to be recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children.
Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased person you want remembered.
The church will host an evening of fine dining, super entertainment, and gracious hostility.
Potluck supper Sunday at 5:00 PM – prayer and medication to follow.
The ladies of the Church have cast off clothing of every kind. They may be seen in the basement on Friday afternoon.
This evening at 7 PM there will be a hymn singing in the park across from the Church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin.
Ladies Bible Study will be held Thursday morning at 10 AM. All ladies are invited to lunch in the Fellowship Hall after the B. S. is done.
The pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the congregation would lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next Sunday.
Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 PM. Please use the back door.
The eighth-graders will be presenting Shakespeare’s Hamlet in the Church Basement Friday at 7 PM. The congregation is invited to attend this tragedy.
Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at the First Presbyterian Church. Please use large double door at the side entrance.
The Associate Minister unveiled the church’s new tithing campaign slogan last Sunday: “I Upped My Pledge – Up Yours.”
Have a grand day and a marvelous week!
~~Angie
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I’ve heard some of these before, but oh, my goodness, I laughed so hard I had tears running down my cheeks! Good way to start a Monday. Thanks, Angie! 🙂
Isn’t it? I’ve had some pretty funny typos myself, but these take the cake!
As a former church secretary, I found these absolutely hilarious! Thank you for starting my week with laughter.
You’re welcome. 🙂
Thank you so much, Angie. Laughter is the best medicine. After been ill and quarantined for Easter is was blessing to read these hilarious bloopers. Have a nice day too.
So sorry you weren’t well for Easter. But joy comes in the morning, no? Have a blessed week!
Thank you for your kind words. I hope so 🙂 Blessings
Love these, Angie! So funny. My favorite has to be the cast-off clothing. What a different a little hyphen can make. 🙂
A much needed laughing session. Have heard of a few, but others also brought on the giggles. Thx!!
I have tears from laughing so hard at these! Thank you for sharing—laughter is good for the soul (and an excellent way to begin the week!).
Blessings, Patti Jo 🙂
Oldies but Goodies! Thanks for the Monday Morning Giggles!
I can relate with the congregation when Miss Charlene sang “I Shall Not Pass This Way Again.” Many years ago, we had someone named Charlene in our congregation who sang “specials” anytime the pastor called on her. One of the few things that was good about that pastor resigning from our church was that we did not have to listen to Miss Charlene sing again. The second one below that one also hits the mark. When our church board decided to stop having a choir, I had a lady approach me a couple of months later to ask when we were going to start the choir again. I told her we had never had a choir. She wanted to argue the point. I told her we had a group of people who stood on the platform to sing each week but they were not a choir. She was one of the main offenders. She never came to practice but always marched up there on the Sundays when she was present without having a clue of what they were singing that day. Often, she was out of sync with the others. We were often “blessed” with a number of people who took the Scripture literally about making a noise. Yes, I left “joyful” out on purpose.
Hilarious, Angela. Thanks for the Monday chuckle!
I enjoyed the chuckle! Thank you for sharing these bloopers.