Eighty-five Years…and Counting

ByDeborah Raney
44 Comments
Wasn’t my dad a cutie?

We celebrated a very special birthday in our family yesterday. My dad turned 85! My siblings and I and our spouses (minus my sister who was out of town), celebrated Daddy with dinner out, birthday cake, and a movie my dad wanted to see—The Darkest Hour—because, as he said, “I remember those days!”

There are a lot of wonderful men in my life—my husband, our sons and sons-in-law, my brother, and many more—but along with Ken, my dad is at the top of the list of great men who’ve influenced my life, and especially men who have demonstrated what a Godly man looks like, and what a devoted husband and father looks like.

You can see how happy I was to be in my daddy’s arms even as a baby.

Daddy is not perfect and he’ll be the first to be sure you know that, but he is a perfect father to me, and I am so thankful to have him in my life. It has always been easy for me to understand the heart of a loving Father God because I have always known a loving daddy.

At a time when I was going through a pretty serious teenage rebellion, it was watching my dad (and my mom) closely, and realizing what lives of integrity they lived, that ultimately drew me back to the Lord and away from the destructive direction I was headed. When my parents told me they wanted me to follow God’s laws and live a certain way, they were already living that way themselves, demonstrating a holy life. My parents were exactly who they were at home as they were in public, and I admired that greatly.

More recently, through my mother’s illness and death, my dad beautifully demonstrated what he’d vowed to my mom on their wedding day: to be true and committed to her “for better or for worse, in sickness and in health, as long as we both shall live.”

My favorite photo of my parents.
My parents (and me on the way!) at the Alamo. Daddy was stationed at the Air Force base in San Antonio at the time.
My parents met when they were eight years old, and their dates as young teenagers were often horseback riding excursions. My mom loved horses all her life (probably because of those dates) and even after she was in nursing care, Daddy made sure she got her hands on a horse every so often.
A lifelong farmer, my dad moved to the city for a couple of years to be closer to my mom after she had to go into nursing care. But he was not a fan of city life, and after Mothe’s death, he couldn’t get back to the country fast enough! He bought a ranch…and a horse, and he is living happily ever after. He runs circles around us all, and we tease him that he’s 85 going on 60.
Daddy loves to have the grandkids come out to ride—and he has twelve of them (most of them married now), and coming up on 30 great-grandkids. And he prays for every one of them by name each morning.

My dad is also the best “Gramps” and “Great Gramps” a kid could ever ask for. Related or not, Daddy never met a baby he didn’t love, and I can’t remember any baby who ever met my dad that didn’t take an immediate liking to him. My parents did mission work in Florida and Haiti for many years, and the girls at the orphanage where they served adored my parents, but my dad especially. It used to tick off my good-natured mom just a little (because she adored babies too) that babies all over the world preferred Daddy over Mothe about 10-1.

I could write an entire book about the blessing my dad is in my life (and in many ways, I suppose I already have, as each of the heroes in my novels—especially the fathers—has a touch of my dad in his character). But this is only a blog post and not a novel, so suffice it to say I am blessed. Thank you, loving heavenly Father, for giving me an earthly father who showed me Who you are and teaches me by his life the way I want to live mine.

Happy 85th, Daddy!

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DEBORAH RANEY's first novel, A Vow to Cherish, inspired the World Wide Pictures film of the same title and launched Deb’s writing career. Forty books later, she's still creating stories that touch hearts and lives. Her novels have won RWA's RITA Award, the ACFW Carol Award, the National Readers Choice Award, and the HOLT Medallion. She is also a four-time Christy Award finalist. Deb is on faculty for several national writers’ conferences and served on the executive board of the 2,500-member American Christian Fiction Writers organization for 18 years before retiring in 2022. She is a recent transplant to Missouri, having moved with her husband, Ken Raney, from their native Kansas to be closer to kids and grandkids. They love road trips, e-biking, Friday garage sale dates, and breakfast on the screened porch overlooking their wooded backyard.

44 Comments

  1. What a beautiful post! Though your dad sounds amazing, the best dad would have to be mine 🙂
    I always thank God for the blessing of dads in our lives. Thanks heaps for sharing!

  2. I am a bit moved when I read your post. It is really the big blessing to have such a good father ( and grandfather ). My grandparents from the both sides are Atheists, so my family lives in permanent fight…
    When I was younger I often dreamed about such a good person in my life. And later, I found it all what I wanted and wished in God. He is the best father ( and grandfather : – ) and friend. Although, sometimes we can have depressions and anxiety from life and future…

    1. I’m so thankful you’ve found your EVERYTHING in God, Blanka. So, so true that He is the best (and original!) Father of us all. My heart goes out to anyone who did not have a godly earthly father because it is a deep sadness and so often causes one to shun the whole idea of a good father.

      1. Deborah, I was so moved by this post. In a way, it seems strange to me because of my earthly father’s abandonment of his wife and children. But it Made me appreciate Mama even more. My brother always sent her a card on Father’s Day! You are so blessed and I know you are aware of that. What a heritage you have! You should frame that photo of your dad on horseback. Leaky eyes reading this.

        1. Thank you so much, Susan. And it brought a tear to my eye to hear about your brother sending your mom a Father’s Day card! How sweet! I’m so glad God sent you a godly husband to step in the gap your earthly father left behind. And I’m thankful this brought warm appreciation for your mom and the huge role she played as both mother and “father.”

  3. I love the photos and your dad has had a wonderful life and could live to be 100. It sounds like God has blessed his faithfulness. A beautiful family you have Deborah. Thank you for sharing.

    1. Thank you, Daphne. We all would love if he lived to be 100. His parents lived to almost 90 and were sharp and alert to the end, so we hope to have him for a good long time!

  4. Deb, what a beautiful tribute to a truly special father. Thank you for sharing this along with the pictures. So good to know such a man lives on this earth and has a godly influence on so many.

  5. What a special post! Thanks for sharing this lovely tribute to your father. He sounds like a wonderful man. You are truly blessed! Happy Birthday to him!

  6. Beautiful post! What a blessing it is to have a godly father who loved your mother and loves his children and grandchildren the way your obviously does. Thank you for sharing a little of him with us today!

  7. That was such a beautiful article on your daddy, Deb. It brought tears to my eyes. It reminded me of when I was young, probably about 5th or 6th grade, and we had to write an essay on why our father should be father of the year. Guess what? Mine won. Why? One sentence that I wrote stuck out to the teacher, the one that said, “My dad doesn’t just take us to church, he goes with us.” Yes, I had a great dad, too. He taught us, not with words, but by example.

    1. Made me cry too. 🙂 Thanks for sharing, Tobi, and for honoring Gramps by naming your son after him! I still remember telling Gramps his name after Max was born and he said, “after me??” Duh, Daddy! 😉

  11. What a lovely tribute to your earthly father! You could even make this blog into a little book and give it to your children and grandchildren as a keepsake. That would also help preserve family history.

  12. What a lovely tribute to an amazing man, Deb. My dad was my hero, too. He always encouraged me to do my best, gently pushed when I needed it, yet supported me all the while. Some of my favorite memories were he and I singing hymns together in the living room on the Sunday mornings he would be in charge of the singing service. He gave me a love of music, a head for math, and a pattern of integrity to follow. He was a godly man, a trusted father, and I miss him greatly. Unlike your wonderful 85 year-old daddy, I lost my father when he was in his 40’s – when I was only 16. His legacy of faith continues, though, and I still strive to make him proud.

    1. Oh, Karen, that would be so hard to lose your dad so young! And yet, it says SO much about him that to this day he is still influencing your life for the Lord! Thank you for sharing that! P.S. I WISH my dad had given me his head for math! I did NOT get that! But I guess I should be happy I got my mom’s head for English and literature!

  13. Happy birthday to your dad! I am also blessed to still have my dad, who is 87, and still in good health. My mother has been gone for over 27 years, but he has remained devoted to his children, grandchildren, and great grandchildren, and is a vital part of all of our lives!

  15. Happy Birthday Blessings to You!
    I love the picture of you with your Dad. He looks like a teenager.
    Please give him a hug from me. My Dad has been gone 20 years and I miss he and my Mom so very much.

  16. What a wonderful tribute to your dad! What a blessing that you put those thoughts, feelings, and memories into words for him! It made me think of how the important people in my life need to know how much they mean to me, and since Valentine’s Day is here, what great timing! Thanks for the impetus!

    1. So true, Sarah. Years ago, I decided that I would start speaking aloud some of the complimentary thoughts I had. If a friend looked especially pretty or I was impressed with how eloquently someone expressed themselves, instead of just thinking it to myself, I would TELL the person. Why not?! So yes, I couldn’t agree more!

  17. What a beautiful blog! You truly are blessed, and the best part is — you KNOW it! My Dad is going to be 96 on 2/23, and he is doing fantastic for his age (he’s forgetful, deaf, and has COPD), but he hasn’t enjoyed life much since my mom died in 2010. I pray for him to find joy again, the Lord can make it so! Thank you for the wonderful tribute to your Dad!

    1. Wow! How blessed you are to still have your dad in your life, Hilda. It gets harder when they aren’t as healthy or happy as they once were. Our dad has made it clear that while he thoroughly enjoys life on this earth, we are not to grieve on HIS account when he’s gone on to heaven (though we will grieve mightily on our own accounts!)

  19. Sweet! I am also a “daddy’s girl”. Mine was 89 last month. He’s always been my hero. Though he didn’t have a good example to model for him, he has been a wonderful husband, father, grandfather and great-grandfather. We are truly blessed to have him.

    God bless you for sharing!

    1. We are blessed, Trudy. And I always feel like it’s a major victory when the cycle of fathers who failed is broken by a man of God who sets an example that will hopefully continue for generations to come! There is always hope, no matter what kind of situation someone grows up in. If it’s not good, it can stop with YOUR generation.

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