With my third baby. I was not yet 30, and too often mistaken for the babysitter!
I loved turning thirty. I was one of those baby-faced moms who often was mistaken for the babysitter, so something about turning thirty made me feel finally “legit.”
I didn’t bat an eye at turning forty. My career had just been launched, our kids were finally all old enough that life was worlds easier (and our older kids were helping raise the “oops” baby, born when I was thirty-five). Nope. Forty was a breeze.
Me and Maxine dish on turning 50 (this greeting compliments of my sister!)
At 50, with my sweet first little grandson who will turn 10 this year!
Fifty might have made me gulp hard, but I learned shortly before that milestone that I was going to be a grandma for the first time and you just can’t waste time worrying about the big 5-0 when something that wonderful is about to happen. Now I’m “Mimi” to four precious, mischievous little boys, and the sweetest little almost-four granddaughter I could ever have hoped for. Every last one of them has blue eyes (something this brown-eyed gal never dared to dream of!) and we have the possibility of more grandbabies on the horizon! The fifties were good.
But alas, last week I turned the big SIX-O. And I must confess, I did it kicking and screaming and crying my eyes out. I also did it um…speeding. (Yes, I got a speeding ticket—ironically for going SIXTY miles an hour—the day before my birthday.)
I really don’t know why sixty hit me so hard. After all, they say sixty is the new forty, right? And I loved my forties. But hit me hard, it did. I spent waayyyyy too much time moping and worrying and inspecting my wrinkles and age spots in the mirror. I spent a solo car trip of two hours crying (I’m talkin’ ugly crying!) all the way, mourning my youth. I just couldn’t seem to shake the melancholy that overtook me at the prospect of this new decade.
Ironically, on that day I got the speeding ticket, my last in my fifties, I’d driven through Starbucks for my free birthday treat, headed for lunch with one of my dearest friends, and I was in the midst of determining to buck up and make the best of my advanced age when the red-and-blue lights strobed in my rearview mirror.
Okay, I confess I did cry when I saw that my lead foot was going to cost me $170! But that was fifty-nine. This is sixty, and the only tears I’ve cried since my birthday have been tears of joy and gratitude. Hey, sixty beats the alternative. And what’s not to like about senior discounts? I have a husband who adores me and tells me no one would guess I’m a day over…fifty-seven. 😉
I may be sixty, but I’m still my daddy’s girl!
My dad, who at eighty-two still rides a horse and wrangles cattle, assures me seventy will be a piece of cake. And my mother-in-law who’ll soon be eighty-one, sets the octogenarian bar high by making fifteen-hundred mile road trips solo, among other amazing things.
My sweet kids, the in-laws, grandkids, and my hubby filled a jar with pretty slips of paper with “60 Things We Love About You.” Tears of joy!
I have four fantastic kids who remembered my birthday in the sweetest way ever. My mom, despite dementia, still knows my name and can still make me smile. I spent a day shortly after turning sixty exploring the beautiful Flint Hills of Kansas with my dad and sisters—a little piece of heaven on earth. I’m blessed to live in the same town with my brother, sisters, parents, and some precious nieces and nephews. I have books to write, people to love, and a God who has a plan—even for an old lady like me.
Have any of the “decade birthdays” been hard for you? Why?
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Sounds like your 60th was pretty special! The speeding ticket for going 60 was too funny!
Having had my last baby at 47, I was nearly 65 when he finished high school, but it’s not so bad; I think my five boys-born mostly in my forties-are helping keep me young!
It is SO true that having babies when we’re a bit older DOES keep us young! I’m encouraged that you were even older than I when you had your last baby! (My grandmother had a baby when my mom was in college, which means I have an uncle who was 4 when I was born. 🙂 )
Hi Deb, I loved reading your thoughts about turning 60. Thanks for being honest and giving us a peek into your heart. I turned 60 this year also. My family surprised me with a birthday party – totally unexpected and lots of fun. Getting older is a challenge, but I like to think of all the wonderful experiences I’ve had and how much I’ve learned and can share in my books and as I talk with friends and family. My mom died when she was 59, so living past 60 feels like a real blessing. I hope this will be your best year yet!
That surprise party sounds wonderful, Carrie. It’s amazing how feeling loved can soften the blow of turning 60. 🙂 But your perspective because of your mom’s death at such a young age really means a lot! Thank you for sharing!
Oh, Happy belated Birthday! You definitely looked like a teen when you were 30, but that just makes you look amazing still today! And you probably handed those genes down. Thank you for sharing. It sounds like life is wonderful 🙂
Thank you for your encouraging words, Danielle! Life IS good. I don’t know why I make it so difficult sometimes! :}
Happy birthday, Deborah! I enjoyed reading your thoughts about romping through the decades. 🙂 I’m sixteen, so I can’t really relate, but I’m sure I will someday!
Sadly, that day will come sooner than you can dream, Emma! But each decade has its own richness and events to be celebrated. My mom always told me that every year of her life was “the best one yet!” I hope I can live with that attitude!
I can certainly relate Deborah. I turned 60 in 2014. I had my second and last baby at 34. (He’s getting married in July and we’re so excited!)
But having breast cancer in 2011, each birthday is special and I’m thankful to God for sparing me. And shortly after my last radiation treatment I did something I said I’d never do: I had a pink breast cancer ribbon tattooed on my right ankle, the same side I had the cancer on. It was a wonderful and freeing experience, plus it made a statement. Every time I see it or someone asks about it I can share my testimony of what God did for me.
Oh, Gail! That puts a whole different light on these birthdays! I’m so thrilled that you are a survivor! And what a testimony you have to God’s glory! Praise His name!
I think 50 was the hardest for me because I was in a new town with new people and nobody cared that I had a birthday. Now I am 74 and loving it more all the time. I have found that I can be useful to the Kingdom of God. This year many friends helped me celebrate my birthday.
Nancy, that is SOOOO encouraging to hear from someone a few years ahead that you love your age more all the time! I do know there’s a certain freedom that comes with being 60! I quit trying to cover my age spots, for one thing, and I’m taking the 2-3 minutes I used to spend doing that reading or enjoying some other activity! I figure a 60-year-old DESERVES to have a few age spots showing! 😉 I’m so glad you have friends to celebrate with now!
I don’t think any of my birthdays (yet) have depressed me (before the day), but I went into a clinical depression soon after my 40th. But my daughter got married the week before, then I had a hysterectomy, and those seemed to throw me into a mid-life crisis. Two years later I started writing and discovered new purpose. Now I’m a year from 70. I’m starting to feel my age. I have to say, though, Deborah, you’re one of those ageless people that won’t ever look old. Good genes, probably. But also that lovely smile and upbeat personality. You just shine. So march on with all the vigor you can muster! You’re an inspiration to all of us. 🙂
Sunni, I would NEVER have guessed you to be a year from 70! Talk about good genes!!! And isn’t it just like God to take a crisis that sends us into depression, and use it to start us on a new and wonderful journey where He can use us for His good. That’s awesome!
Deb,
Happy 60th. I’m not so very far behind. I turned 56 in May.
My roughest birthday was 28. Believe it or not, I had a reaction similar to your reaction to turning 60. I don’t know why, but there it is. I haven’t paid much attention to birthdays (or age) since.
What part of the Flint Hills are your favorite? I grew up in Michigan and lived there for 42 years (that’s when I got married and moved to Kansas). I fell in love with the Flint Hills the first time I laid eyes on them and that day was a cold, grey, threatening snow December. Hubby and I still make day trips out there as often as possible.
Carrie, who knows why a certain birthday triggers that crisis, but wow, 28 seems SO very young right now! 🙂 I’m going to take notes from you and not pay much attention to birthdays from now on!
I haven’t explored the Flint Hills extensively enough to choose a favorite part. Every single inch of them that I’ve seen is just glorious! My sisters and I were saying how we’d love to go back and see them in the snow!
Yes, yes, yes! I love snow and I love the Flint Hills, so seeing them under a blanket of snow is definitely on my bucket list!
I’d also like to be out there during a thunderstorm. All that sky and those clouds and lightning…. Makes my heart beat faster just thinking about it.
Of course, you’d have to be on a high place.
Happy birthday Deborah. Welcome to the 60’s. None of my birthdays followed by 0s have bothered me a whole lot. Frankly when I turned 60 I was too busy looking forward to retirement. I’m 68 now and although I’ve slowed down some I love retirement. Living on my own schedule. I have grandchildren and great grandkids. Would I want to be young again? Frankly no. I wouldn’t trade it with what I have now. Am I useless because I’m older? Only if I let myself be useless!
It’s wonderful that you’re enjoying your retirement so much. It’s funny because even though Ken and I are working harder, and working longer hours than we ever have in our lives, we often say that we feel like we ARE retired. I think that’s because we just love what we do! Neither of us really have any plans to retire at this point. We wouldn’t mind having a little more time to travel, especially to see our kids. But we love where God has us right now! (And you’re so right that we’re only “useless” if we let ourselves be!)
You are blessed, sister! Your family your heritage is so much more than most of us have. Enjoy it all. I had to laugh because I am a bit over 60 and just like you at 30 was taken for a kid. At 40 I rode the carnival rides with my kids like a kid and met my new husband- my soul mate in the Lord. At 50 I struggled a little but when 60 hit, the face and neck—oh, my! No one says, “Oh you look so young!” any more. But I am so happy to have the wisdom of God I have now then in the decades before. It is worth all the former “glory” to have the real silver glory of His wisdom. And here I am writing my first novel at 61.
And p.s. You still look great!
Sandy, I LOL your “face and neck” line! That’s exactly where 60 hit me! And yes, just 10 short years ago I ALWAYS heard, “no WAY you could possibly be a grandma!” Nobody ever questions that any more. But you know what? If that’s the worst problem I have in life, I AM blessed! Thank you for sharing that wisdom!
I have to add this—thinking about my mom who is gone now. When she got to 80, she started to get those comments again. Wow you don’t look 80! So there is hope for 70 and 80 for us yet! LOL!
Hey! That’s good to hear!! 🙂
Happy Birthday! I hit 60 last year. I was too busy to worry about it too much. I am the chief caregiver for my disabled husband and just glad we are both still here and I have him to share the years with.
Ah, perspective! Thank you for giving it, and may the Lord bless you as you care for your husband. That is a privilege and an honor, but I’m sure it isn’t always easy. Bless you, Shirley!
Just FYI–the day you turned 60 was the LAST day of your SIXTIETH year. You are now in your 61st year. I decided not to worry about age the day I asked my great aunt Bess how it felt to be almost 100. She looked thoughtful and said she’d never really gotten over feeling 18. I decided I wouldn’t, either. 😉
I know! Several people were kind enough to correct me that I’m starting my SEVENTH decade! Yikes! (I never was good at math!! LOL!) But I LOVE your aunt Bess’s attitude! It’s strange because for whatever reason, I feel like I’m 34. And that’s odd because I have two kids that are OLDER than 34. 😉
Well, since I’m the 57 you don’t look a day over, I can only hope that I look as good as you do at 60! I’ve never had problems with any age, and assume I won’t when I turn 60. After all, I’m still lots younger than Roger! 🙂 You just keep cranking out those books and entertaining us with your flowers, yard sale finds, and doughnut dates!
Awww! Thanks, Kathleen. I honestly did NOT expect 60 to faze me, but boy did it sneak up on me and surprise me with its fury! But truly, once THE day was over, I’ve been totally FINE with it. 🙂
Dear Deborah,
None of my birthday’s bothered me but ask me again in 10 years, I might tell you a different story.
How Blest you are to still have your Mom and Dad. My Mom also had Dementia so cherish each and everyday with her.
Happy Birthday Blessings!
Thanks, Janet. And we DO cherish every day with my mom. She still knows all of us, still has her same sweet spirit, and still makes us laugh. And my dad is so wonderfully devoted to her. It’s a blessing to watch them together. Truly living out their vows.
First of all, I have to say that you make 60 look wonderful! The body may be aging on the outside, but your spirit will never be old! My hardest birthday was my 48th, because my mother passed away at the age of 48. In fact, that just seemed to be a hard year to get through, like I felt something awful was going to happen to me too at that age. So really, 50 seemed pretty good, as I counted all my blessings. My best birthday, however, was when I turned 51. My daughter was due one week before my birthday with my first grandchild. Whenever I would talk to her belly, I would tell the baby not to listen to anyone tell her September 14, that the 21st was her day to arrive. I had no idea it would actually come to pass. But after an early morning induction on the 20th, an all day labor, and even finally a decision to do a c-section, little Missy held on to arrive at 12:03 am on her Mimi’s birthday! This day will never be the same for me again. It’s like starting over with the celebrating. So this September it doesn’t matter that I’ll be 54, cause I’ll be celebrating my precious 3 year old Emma!
Thank you, Tonya! And its completely understandable that 48 would have been hard for you. I’m so sorry you lost your mom at such a young age!
That is so awesome that your granddaughter arrived on your birthday! What a precious thing to share! By the way, my grandkids call me “Mimi” also! It’s so sweet to hear them say it!
Deb, you look great! Don’t let the figures that go along with
the candles bother you. I think the clarity and wisdom God
gives us, is wonderful to share with others. We were on a cruise
with the kids for my 60th a few years ago, and although I’m
amazed how quickly time goes, I don’t use anything in a bottle
to color my hair yet! 🙂
Birthday Blessings~ Diane
That’s amazing that you don’t have to color your hair! I only color mine because it’s always been a mousey blond/brown color and I like highlights. But those highlights probably color a bit of gray these days too. Only my hairdresser knows for sure—and she’s not telling! 😉
I really didn’t mind turning 60, or even 62 when I signed up for Social Security. But 65 hit me really hard – when I signed the Medicare paperwork and applied for my AT&T pension. Those days were when I REALLY felt old. Now at 67, thinking about my mom who was 91 when she went Home, I realize that I’ve still got 1/3 of my life to go and am wondering what trouble I can get into and enjoy for my last 30 years, God willing.
I love your attitude, Deb! And I’d never guess you were 67 either!! All my grandparents lived into their late 80s or early 90s, so Lord willing, I have a few good years left, too! And my hubby’s maternal grandparents both lived to be 101 and celebrated their 81st anniversary, so I hope to have my hubby by my side to the very end! 🙂 Of course, I’ll gladly take whatever God has in store. He knows best, and He alone holds my times in His hands!
You make 60 look great, Deb! My favorite birthday was turning 20 as I could finally say I wasn’t a “teen” anymore. (During my 19th year I would tell others that I was “twenty minus one”.) Getting older comes with changes but I try to look forward to what the Lord has in store for my life at each age. Don’t think of yourself as another year older…but another year wiser. 🙂
Another year wiser! I like that! And I hope I AM! Thanks, Jennifer!
I can really relate to this, Deb, though I won’t be 60 for two more birthdays. I don’t even like to say how old I am because I just can’t relate to that big number! I don’t feel that old in my mind ( but sometimes in my body). My 40th birthday was kind of tough, just thinking about the number, but I had a 6 month old so he (and his sister who is 6 years older) have kept me feeling somewhat young. The toughest birthday by far was my 50th. I had moved back to Kansas a few months earlier because my husband wanted a divorce. But, I’ve spent the years since learning how to let God be my husband.
Thanks for sharing with us and I hope you have many more birthdays (without the speeding ticket).
I’m glad your kiddos have kept you young, Pam. But I’m so sorry about that tough 50th! You are wise though to have turned that into a time of growing closer to the Lord. Thanks so much for sharing and may your 60th arrive with great joy!
I must admit that age has never bothered me in the least little bit….I was 65 in March, so I’m “well into my dotage” but I am blessed beyond measure. Sitting and talking with one of my sons the other day, it suddenly dawned on me just how blessed I am….In all of my 65 years, the most serious illness I ever had was the German measles….I had EVERY kind of measles on the planet growing up along with a good dose of chicken pox….most of the usual childhood illnesses….even now I am not on any medications….I am enjoying life with my husband and our grands….and the 2 of our brood of 9 who still live at home. Life is good at the Nut House!!!
The “Nut House” sounds like a very happy place, Margie! Glad you’ve embraced every age so joyously. I’m making that my goal!
Loved your post, Deb, but I’m sorry about your speeding ticket. 🙁
The jar of notes is such a sweet treasure for you!!
I’m still clinging to my 50s (okay, barely) and recently one of my daughters commented that I’m sixty. I quickly
reminded her that I’m not quite there, so please let me enjoy saying I’m 50-something for a few more months, LOL.
For some reason, turning forty was a bit “traumatic” for me – – but now that doesn’t seem old at all. 😉
Birthday hugs to you!!
Don’t cling too hard, Patti Jo! Come on in to sixty…I’ve been here a week and the water’s fine! 🙂
Happy Bday (again), Deb. You’re a gorgeous sixty, babe! And oh, that pic of you when you were a young mom… You look about 15! You still have that youthfulness about you, never fear. And just a little bit of snarkiness too. ; }
Bless you, Tammy. And just so you know: I think I have YOU to thank for every snarky bone in my body. 🙂
Deborah, thank you for sharing your heart. I’m drawing near to 50 (closer to 50 than 40 now) … and it seems unreal. When my parents were that age, they seemed so old. Now, it seems so young. And definitely, the mirror makes it harder. But you are one beautiful lady. God bless you.
Bless you, Shelli! And yes! I remember when my mom told me she was 34 and I truly thought she’d probably pass away any day! LOL! Oh, to be 34 again! 😉 But truly, I wouldn’t go back (well, except maybe physically!) But there’s a lot to be said for the wisdom and acceptance and calm of “old” age. Thanks for taking the time to comment!
I loved hearing your words. I’m late to the party but Happy Birthday anyway. I can relate. I turn forty next month and I my oldest just graduated high school. I found this verse and thought you might like it. From the outside looking in, it almost seems like it could be your life verse.
Psalm 71:17-19New International Version (NIV)
17 Since my youth, God, you have taught me,
and to this day I declare your marvelous deeds.
18 Even when I am old and gray,
do not forsake me, my God,
till I declare your power to the next generation,
your mighty acts to all who are to come.
19 Your righteousness, God, reaches to the heavens,
you who have done great things.
Who is like you, God?
Hugs,
Cara Grandle
What powerful words from Scripture, Cara! Thank you so much for posting those! And for taking the time to respond! If your 40s are as wonderful for you as mine were for me, you’re in for a great new decade! 🙂
Happy 60 to you.
You are lovely.
I do believe 60 is the new 40. You wear it so well.
So thankful I got to meet you at ACFW.
You are such an encouraging example of obeying God with your calling to write. He has abundantly blessed you and your family. May He continue to bless you with lots of words. I love your novels.
I learn a lot about writing just from reading them.
Take care and slow down! My hubby just got pulled over a few days ago. I happened to be in the passenger seat! 45 in a 25 zone. NOT GOOD!!!
Those red and blue lights come out of nowhere!
Warmly,
Gail
Thank you, Gail! Your words are so encouraging. And I’M the one who’s glad we got to meet at ACFW! Hope you’ll be there this year too! P.S. I was going 60 in a 40, so I feel your husband’s 20-miles-over-the-speed-limit pain! 😉
Happy Birthday (again), dear Deb!
Thirty eight was a not a good birthday for me. I’d believed Adonai had something special planned for me during my 37th year, but what I’d hoped didn’t happen. To wake up on my 38th birthday was hard. I cried and cried. But like you said about your birthday, once I got through the actual day, everything was fine. Thirty eight was just another year.
My worst birthday was my 44th. My beloved Mama had come home on hospice. My birthday was the 17th of September. Mama died at 3:22AM, 19 September 2004. I stopped celebrating my birthday for that reason.
I am edging toward the Big 5-5 (this September). No worries about my age. Adonai has a plan for me. He knows the number of hairs on my head (which are falling out, btw), the number of days I have left on earth until I’m called Home to be with Him. I am content to remain in the palm of His hand.
Thank You, Adonai, for however many days You give me!!
Jann, I’m so sorry about those tough birthdays. But I’m adopting your attitude: Thank you, Lord, for however many days You give me! And remembering that our very best days here on earth with Him in our lives are but a shadow of how wonderful our eternity with Him will be.