Two Ways to Cope with the Stress of the Holidays

The holiday season is full of demands. We have our to-do lists that run longer than a novel—baking an old-fashioned fruit cake, mixing fresh snow into ice cream for the kids, and hand-embroidering a Christmas stocking for the pet hamster.

Okay, so not really!

But most of us DO feel the increased pressure in one form or another during the Christmas season. There’s the decorating, baking, shopping, wrapping gifts, writing Christmas cards, concerts, parties, and more.

Even without the added holiday activities, we already struggle to keep up with the demands of work, family, and life. It just doesn’t seem possible to add in ONE more thing. But during December we’re expected to add in a DOZEN!

We either live in a state of constant stress, hardly enjoying anything because of how busy we are. Or we give up, plop down on the couch, and wallow in depression and anxiety.

We may ask ourselves how can we do anything effectively when life turns into such a chaotic race of running from one thing to the next.

Once a friend asked me: Please tell me your secret for keeping up with your writing, your family, social media, and all the other things you do.

My secret? Hmmm. . .

Here was my initial answer: I really have no secret and constantly struggle with how to keep up. I think there comes a point where we just can’t keep up with everything anymore.

After thinking about “my secret” for a few more days, however, I realized there are two things I already do to an extent but need to do more often.

1. Show Grace. We need to show grace to ourselves. We have to realize it’s physically impossible to keep up with all of the demands life (and writing). We can only do so much, and sometimes we just have to sit back and say, “I did enough. I wasn’t perfect. But it was enough for now.”

I’ve always had a Christmas to-do list that was a mile long. And in recent years, I’ve begun to shorten that list. But even with a sparse list, I still can’t do everything perfectly, the way I’d like. I can’t make homemade gifts. The family Christmas picture is amateur. I don’t send nearly as many Christmas cards. And I can’t spend a lot of time shopping.

I have to give myself permission not to do it all. To only do what I can. To give myself a break from the high expectations (that usually come when I compare myself with others!).

2. Evaluate Priorities. Sometimes we need to show ourselves grace, but then there are times we need to give ourselves a lecture on the value of hard work, put our head down, and get busy doing what needs to be done. It’s all too easy to moan instead of working diligently with our whole heart on the things that need to be a priority.

But what things should be a priority? Obviously that answer will vary from person to person. But we can’t let ourselves get side-tracked by those good, but lesser important priorities. At this stage in my life, my priorities are my family and my work.

How do you handle the pressure to keep up with all of the demands? Do you need to give yourself a break from the pressure to keep up?

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Jody Hedlund

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Award-winning author Jody Hedlund makes her home in central Michigan with her husband and five children. When she's not busy with her family, she loves to read and consume large amounts of chocolate and coffee.

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